I stand by, a mute spectator to another year zooming past, and for the first time in 23 years I look at my birthday for what it truly signifies – growing older. The feeling is not something I like at all. I earnestly wish, mindless though it sounds, that I could turn back the wheels of time and go back to times when life was intertwined with less complexities and responsibility. The future beholds the unknown and scares, frightens at times. Yet, I swallow, and move… ahead.
Such a gloomy account of my birthday is hardly called for, you might say. But I feel the pinch of the irony hard. Year after year, birthdays used to be something to look forward to in the coming year and there was an impatience to rush out of one phase of life into another. The prospects thro’ the years ranged from Salman pink (That’s how the school diary described the shade!) school uniforms of Class 6 to the idea of being a self sufficient and independent working professional. Yet, now, having accomplished all this, there is an overwhelming urge to will time to slow down, to evade, to escape, yet it surges ahead, catching me unawares…
This is a reflection of the years gone by – greenery shouts most conspicuously, yet there have been shades of other emotions, some of them stark and indelible.
Ok, I do not wish to foolishly stick to my claim of this painting having sprung as a reflection of my innermost feelings. This was just a result of a combination of extreme frustration at Java and inspiration from this blog. And thanks to Artpad of course. And as it neared its final stages, it struck my unfailingly uncreative art mind that the explanation I gave above is also plausible.
The above paragraph would not have made any sense to you if you did not have any clue of my “artistic abilities”. For the uninitiated, here goes! For the first ten years of my life, like all unassuming kids of my age, I slowly mastered the art of scenery drawings – 2 inverted blunt V s and an inverted U peeping out of them and alternate long and short lines surrounding it- all done to precise perfection. In fact I also went a step further to embellish this art with minute curvy V s (birds) and a shapely tree strutting out of the mountain. Extra effects like hut and a river flowing by the hut were added depending on momentary artistic temperaments. Stick figures of man and woman by the hut were the final touches to the master piece.
Over the last ten years however, the only art form I have been able to successfully master is Amoeba drawing. Whole of class seven, I painstakingly managed to create on my exam papers the most innovative forms of amoeba that even the most creative of the species would not have thought of assuming. Sadly though after that one year, I have never gotten the opportunity to display my …err… talents.
Now I guess it makes more sense why this blurb of colors merits position in my blog.
Oh, and it does bring back memories Kadhala Kadhala -of that bus journey from New Delhi railway station to Pilani on Rakesh ji’s bus, watching Kadhala Kadhala. Of the Falooda – Cassata and the right-left scenes!
And the train of memories is triggered… Again…